Thursday, March 19, 2009

Swimming in Guilt, a Tribute to Zoie...

Sunday was probably one of the better days of Zoie's short 10 year life. In the morning she romped in the desert with a buddy and then we went home to host a second visitor, a 2 year old Great Dane named, Zowi. Although it was apparent that their age difference separated them, my little girl did everything she could to keep up. We went home Sunday evening from our jaunt at the park and Zoie slept well, after a light dinner of hamburger and rice..

Monday, Zoie got me up at the usual time, 8:15 and she seemed a little slow, but we still did our excursion to the local park and Zoie enjoyed the spring breeze. Around 4 PM, I made her Mac and Cheese, her favorite and sneaked a little kibble in, knowing full well that she HATES it now that she's so spoiled. Not unlike a lot of nights, she wasn't able to keep her dinner down. In the 10 years that she graced my life, her usual was to only eat about 6 times a week. She was always plagued by an over acid stomach, so her vomiting was typical. Monday night was exceptionally bad though. She was worse the day after Bogie passed away though. At about 10:30, I announced bedtime and she bound up the stairs to our bedroom, laying in her bed with her head up. I checked on her several times until I was satisfied that she was asleep and finally turned out the lights around midnight. I got up at 5 and used the restroom and she was sleeping. At 6 AM, she was wandering around the bedroom looking a little disoriented, I told her to go back to bed and she did. At 7, she wandered over to the side of my bed and stumbled and fell, trying so hard to get back up. I told her to just stay down and tried to sooth her, realizing that there was something seriously wrong. She layed next to my bed on her side breathing shallowly, while I soothed her, wondering what to do. I called a friend, realizing I had no idea. My friend offered no solutions and I hung up. By then she was gone. Her eyes remained open and her breathing ceased, as I wept, much like I'm doing now. Zoie, my baby girl was gone too. We just lost Bogie 58 days earlier and everyone said that she probably won't last long without her mate, but I disagreed. Zoie was healthy and vital and ran like a Thoroughbred. Poetry in motion, you could say...

Yesterday I spent alone, for the most part. While I got a haircut I received a call from the Great Dane Rescue lady, Linda. I had left her a message that Zoie had passed away and I had 2 beds, along with about 60 LB of kibble that I wanted to donate. She told me to come by anytime and since she lost her job last week, she's around full time. Today, I carried the Dynamic Duo's beds down to the Expedition and loaded up the dog things. Linda called me later to tell me of a male Harle, 4 years old that has his ears cropped, but is intact that she can't take because he's not neutered. As my heart broke, I had to tell her no, that I need a little time dogless. I drove to her house about 30 minutes away and when I rang her bell, that old familiar Great Dane bark announced my arrival. She opened the door and I was charged by about 600 LB of Dane flesh. Two sisters and a BEAUTIFUL male fawn, that stands about 40 inches at the shoulder, with cropped ears and an attitude. To say it was love at first sight is an understatement. She told me to be careful with him, because he doesn't like men and was abused and full of bruises when she got him. He ran to get his bone and brought it to me while doing his "hello dance". I told Linda that I'd take him in a heartbeat, but she said, no. She's keeping him.

It was time to carry in the mattresses and food. I said my goodbyes and only cried about 3 times on the ride home. Hey, what the hell happened to my testosterone?


C.A. said...

Mel, I truly am so so sorry for the loss of your companions. It's just like losing a family member.



Anonymous said...

Mel, I am also really sorry to hear
about this. I try not to imagine
losing our two little rugrats, but
one day it will happen...hard to
think about. Thinking of you,
Deb (Julie's friend from Indiana).