Friday, February 26, 2010

A Day with the Lovely Jules.... "Get on the Ground"!

The Lovely Jules and I teamed up yesterday to see what damage we could do to our already damaged reputations. It started with her picking me up and delivering a house warming gift to me. A tomato plant. We placed the little plant in the garden where it will one day soon earn it's keep. We headed to the barrio in search of an an address of a customer of Jules' and frankly I thought they were about to film an episode of Cops! Any second from any alley I was expecting to hear a loud speaker scream to us, "Get on the ground, get on the ground", but it never happened. We were delivering a rock purchase from Jules' new business. She collects rock across our Sonoran Desert and sells them on eBay. Quite profitable it appears. After dropping the precious gem ($9.95) we searched for a place to eat lunch.

Bitzee Mama's came to mind, I always like their over sized portions, so we headed to 58th Ave and Glendale in Glendale's infamous "Old Town" area. Whoa! What a disappointment. My mouth was already watering for their Chicken Fried steak, at least a 1/2 LB portion covered with rich, thick white gravy. (Don't tell my Cardiologist) I really lucked out, it was on their daily special for a mere $5.95. I ordered while Julie chose the hard to find grilled cheese sandwich. When the food came, my mouth fell open. Not in a good way either. My anticipation of a mouth watering 1/2 LB meal was quickly dashed by the presence of a 3" patty breaded and covered with a brown gravy and a teeny scoop of mashed potatoes, the kind you used to get in 4th grade in your school cafeteria. I was disappointed to find that the economy had even caught up with Bitzee Mama's!

We left there and Jules dropped me off at Paul's to pick up one of my cars and she headed for jail to visit her incarcerated son. I later found out that she was declined visitation today because Sheriff Joe wasn't in the mood for company yesterday. He just does that sometimes, declines visitation for no apparent reason besides he said so!

When I got home I made a sandwich and signed up for Match.com .............again. The emails declining my attentions have already started arriving. This should make for some good stories...

Saturday, February 20, 2010

Great Dane Fever


It starts with the sweats and then a mild fever. Eventually if not treated, it can go to the chills and ultimately seizures, but I never let it get that bad. I usually go ahead and bite the Great Dane bullet and just adopt one.


Yesterday found me in a place called Queen Creek delivering my unwanted dog crate to a young couple that we owned by 7 dogs, four or them Great Dane pups. The oldest was a rather portly Chihuahua, whose best friend happened to be a 9 month old male Harlequin Great Dane. Talk about an unlikely couple, but you couldn't convince them that they weren't meant to be. The 4 Great Danes consisted of a pair of Brindles, he was 2 and 1/2 and she was about a year old and they will certainly be lovers during her next heat. Then there was my personal favorite, the male Harle, mirroring my late best friend Bogie and last was a 6 month old Black boy that was a bit timid within this pack. I came away from my meeting completely covered in puppy spit, but loved every stain on my well worn sweatshirt.


On my long ride home, I kept thinking if I only get one this time, he won't eat that much and it would be good company for me and thought of all the exercise I'd get walking him everyday, not to mention the security factor and pretty much justified it all in my head. Then I remembered being tied down to those dogs for the last 11 years, not even affording myself a vacation away from the Dynamic Duo. Then I remember the scenes like the one at the top of this page and the Great Dane fever starts all over again!

Thursday, February 18, 2010

Dog Crate for Sale

Crate for Sale
It turns out that Craig's List has been a valuable ally in unloading unwanted items that still hold a value. As I wrote about earlier, I quickly and conveniently sold my dining room set and earlier this week I was going through my over crowded garage and noticed that I had a dog crate occupying way too much room. So I notified the nice people at Craig's List and they supplied me with 3 interested buyers within hours. I had no idea that it would be such a hot item. The crate was for my badly missed Great Danes that left me last year. I'll always miss them, but not the crate that was always in my way. I sold it to a young couple that currently have 4 young Great Danes and 3 other "off brand" pups that share their Queen Creek home. I loaded the crate into my Expedition to take it to the young lady at her job, after her husband assured us it would fit into the back of her Honda Civic. I smugly laughed to myself, knowing full well it was ridiculous. But I had to be in that part of town anyway, so I agreed to bring it to her. I realized only a miracle or a can opener was going to make that 54"X48"X36" crate, fit into that little car, but I also knew she would pay me for my trouble and I agreed to deliver it to her home. But no, she paid me but insisted her husband's car would easily fit the humongous crate and she sent him to my house to fetch it.

This guy pulls up after driving 60 miles and gets out of his Chrysler 300 and he's about 6' 6" tall and built like a linebacker. He tried every way but sideways to fit that thing in his car, but quickly gave up when I once again offered to deliver it for the price of gas. Feeling defeated, he climbed into his full size car that began looking like a compact with him inside. I was kind of looking forward to the drive of 60 miles and seeing his 7 dogs, 4 of them my favorites, Great Danes!

Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Roller Coasters of Life...

In 2003, I started hearing from my oldest son's ex-wife, who lived in Iowa, along with my 2 granddaughters, ages 6 and 8, then. She was telling me of her plans to move to AZ, where she was raised by her grandmother in Tucson. It really excited me because I'd be in close contact with my 2 granddaughters, as they planning on buying a house about 5 blocks from me.

When they finally arrived, months later, I was meeting my youngest granddaughter for very first time and seeing her older sister for the first time since she was an infant. I acquired the name of Gramps pretty quick and that soon changed to Grumps, my choice. They'd ride their bikes over to see me and I was always just thrilled to see them. Sometimes I'd take the whole bunch of them out for dinner or just the girls to McDonalds. When I'd go shopping at Costco, I'd always bring 1/2 of my take to them on the way home. Twenty LBS of potatoes, they get ten. A package of frozen hamburgers, 1/2 to the Grand kids.

In Jan 2005, I had to have heart surgery and somehow my daughter-in-law snuck herself and my oldest granddaughter in around midnight to visit me. I recall being near death and feeling my D-I-L's tears falling onto my arm as she mourned my illness. Not a good place for a 9 year old.

By the end of that year, I survived and my DIL had married her boyfriend, secretly. Without a word, they went downtown and got married. I thought that strange, after all they were living together. Why the secret ceremony? Now my 2 granddaughters were being raised by two total strangers, not related to me. I guess that's fairly common these days. After a couple of years, my DIL called and asked me if I'd be home, she needed to talk to me in person. She came over and was crying and after a long and drawn out story, she told me that they were broke and they were losing their house and could she borrow $2000 to help get caught up. Without thinking, I just said, yes. Then she said, "could you make it three"? ....And I said, sure. I wrote out a check made out to both she and her husband and as soon as she had it in her hand, the tears stopped and she was out the door. She went directly to the bank where she forged her husband's signature on it and cashed it. I never heard another word from either of them. Soon, about a year had gone by and no calls, nor would they answer the phone when I called. Once I went to the house, remember it was just 5 blocks away and rang the bell. I could hear them inside, but no one answered the bell.

Finally, I wrote to the husband at work and my DIL at home. I got a return email from the man, saying that sometimes they talk about the fact that they should pay me. That was it! My next email insisted on $300 a month for the next 10 months and I was declined. I did get a check for $200 once and another for a hundred, but I finally turned them over to a collection agency that is owned by a friend of mine and collected the entire debt, less the commission for collecting it. The family then left town after their house was foreclosed upon and I never heard another word from any of them. I heard they moved to Ohio.

Sunday night, rather late, I was on Facebook and thought of doing a search on the children and to my surprise, I did find the little one, Madison. I immediately shot off a friend request and not even 10 minutes later, Madison, now about 13 or 14 replied, YES! I instant messaged her, she was online and we chatted for a few minutes. I told her that she really ought not to tell her mother about chatting with me and she wanted to know why. I just explained that Mommy was mad at me. I asked her write me an email explaining all that she has done in the past few years and how much I loved her. She asked me to do the same and returned the I love you. We disconnected and 5 minutes later, I went back to her Facebook page and was no longer welcome. Her evil mother made her sever me as a friend and a grandfather. How sad...

I was so excited about making contact with Madison and then sooo let down when it ended. I just wish I had some recourse. Something positive, so no one got their feelings hurt or in trouble... But what?

Sunday, February 14, 2010

The Dating Guy Resurfaces...........Again

I had a couple of dates with a lady yesterday. Actually, that's a new experience, having 2 dates in one day with the same woman. I've spent the entire day with a lady and on occasion, several days in a row with a lady. A few times, I spent several years with a woman, but they call that marriage.

The lady's name is Beth and she needed to take her grandson up around my neck of the woods for a tutoring appointment at 9:30 AM. Then she'd have a couple off hours to kill, so I told her to call me when she's near and we'd meet somewhere. I never woke until 9 AM, after a night of tossing and turning. I actually saw 7 AM on the clock and was still up. I awoke at 9, with a roar of "Oh shit" and ran for the shower. I showered, shaved and was drying my hair when the phone rang and it was Beth, laughing. For a moment I thought she could see me, but it was just her friendly way of saying good morning. She said, "Well, where are we gonna met?" Drawing a blank, I screamed Fresh and Easy into the phone, it's on the corner of 12th Street and Bell. I'll see you there in 15 minutes... I hung up and had my work cut out for the next 14 minutes, just getting there on time. It seemed that I climbed into my clothes, all in one major motion and was putting on my shoes on my way out the door. I screeched into the parking lot, just as Beth pulled up driving exactly the same kind of car as me. My Toyota Corolla. She parked in the very corner of the parking lot and I pulled beside her. She looked at me and said, Mel? I said I'd better be or we're both gonna be in trouble. She hopped into my car and we took off for my old house where my realtor was holding a garage sale. I took her on a tour of the old house for the before and after effect. From there we went to my new house and sat and drank some coffee.........finally!

It seemed that Beth and I liked each other enough for me to tell her I'd like to see her again. I told her I'd call her. Beth is a psychiatric nurse and as predicted, she works a rather unusual schedule. She's off Saturday and Tuesday and she works from noon till midnight, 5 days a week at the state hospital.

About 3 PM, my phone rang and it was Beth. She said you were gonna call me, so I saved you the trouble. Since it was Valentine's Day eve, I knew all of the fine dining places would be booked up (and expensive) so I asked her if she likes Chinese food and she did. Naturally, we went to my favorite Chinese restaurant and enjoyed a little House Special Chicken (#14) my favorite. By the way, the Chinese restaurant is right next door to Smart and Final. So our day started at Fresh and Easy and ended at Smart and Final. I know there's a joke there somewhere! We headed back to my house to make out. Yeah, you read that right.

Well, the making out never happened. Probably because of the garlic and onions, but more realistically because we engaged in a rather heavy conversation. She told me she is the legal guardian of her 11 year old grandson and although he doesn't live with her, she is guardian so she can hold health insurance for him. He has some learning disabilities. He also has fixation issues, whatever they are. He'll obsess on different things in an unusual way. For example video cameras. He'll go to a store and look at video cameras for hours and talk about them when he gets home and can't sleep because of this obsession. He's also addicted to video games. I listened and learned. Then she volunteer something that just made the hair on the back of my neck stand. She told me that in her daughter's building and they live in an apartment in a rather poor neighborhood, but it's what they can afford. There is a man that lures the little boy into his apartment with video games and the boys spends hours with him. He's a gay man, about 40 years old and he has AIDS. She had my undivided attention. I asked questions. Why are they letting him be in the company of this man? Why don't they call the police? Well, first the daughter went down to the man and told him she did not want her son in his company and he told the mom, that it was his business and there was nothing she could do about it, the boys likes to come around. Then Beth went to talk to this alleged pedophile's apartment he told her the same thing. The police have been notified and they say there is no crime committed. This is ludicrous to me! The is a potential pedophile abusing an 11 year old boy and no one wants to do anything about it? I asked if she checked him out online and she said she doesn't know his last name. WHAT? Why not? Any respect I had for this woman walked out the front door. How could this little boy be victimized and no one is saving him?

At that point I started winding my alarm clock and she said it was getting late. I skipped the kiss goodnight and waved goodbye. She's off again on Tuesday, but I think I'm going to be busy.

Saturday, February 6, 2010

Thinning the Inventory at Mel's Home Warehouse

I tried to sell my dining table and 6 chairs on Craig's list. I took pictures, posted them on the world famous free website, Craig's List and waited. The first day nothing. Then on the second day the ad ran, I got a mid-afternoon text from a lady named Maritza, that said to call her when I received her text. I did. She was a Hispanic lady and was so excited about getting to talk to me that I was beginning to think I was a celebrity. But when I looked in the mirror, it was just me, Mel Fisher car salesman (retired). She asked me if I'd hold it for her until Saturday at 5:30, when she was off work and could come and give me my money. I laughingly told her I'd been holding it for 17 years, I don't see why I can't hold it for another 2 days.. (Fully not knowing about Jeanette) Jeanette called Thursday afternoon and was extremely excited about my dining set. I haven't seen people this excited about my dining room set since the salesman sold it to me many years ago and then it was only him! Again Jeanette told me she worked for a doctor's office and I was tempted to ask which one, as he's probably chopped a body part or two of mine. I restrained myself. Jeanette used her 3 kids screaming in the background to make me realize she was more than serious. I was asking $250 and she asked me if I'd take $200 and would I deliver it? Maritza was sounding better all the time and I told her precisely that. She backed down and agreed to the price and to allow me to bring it to her after she inspects it at my lovely suburban home (That I no longer reside at)..

Jeanette started calling at 8 AM and I didn't crawl out of bed until 9. I answered my cell as soon as I turned it on and it was Jeanette "hot to trot" for that table and 6 chairs. She wanted to meet me at 10, but I'd just gotten up, so I stalled her until 11AM.

At exactly 11 AM my phone rang and it was Jeanette telling me she was running 10 minutes late and not to leave. I told her I'd see her soon and hung up. Right at 11:10 someone knocked on the front door and it was the lovely Jeanette, all 5 feet of her. She was full of piss and vinegar and ran around my former home and said things like "this is the largest house I've ever seen, you must be rich"! She should only know.... In tow, Jeanette had brought the father of her 3 babies and the 3 little munchkins, ages 9, 7, and 2. Her children were literally beautiful. Jeanette was an African American girl about 27 and she was probably 1/2 Asian, as well and Daddy was a fair skinned young fellow that I took a liking to. She and the kids moved here from Cleveland, Ohio for a better life and Daddy just followed. They gave me my money and I helped them to deliver it to their home in old Scottsdale, not far from Linda's house. In fact I almost stopped by. I stopped and texted Maritza and told her the dining set was sold. She texted me back, asking me what I was talking about, and that I probably had the wrong person.

As I drove home, I felt productive for the first time in a long time. I liked the feeling. I think I paid about $1000 for that dining set and I sold it for $250, hmm.... If I could figure out how to do that on a regular basis, could I make up the loss with volume???

Thursday, February 4, 2010

You Know I'm Available..................Again...

I'm not posting as much as I was, basically because all of the things happening in my life currently are of a personal nature and not for publication, however.....

Finding myself without a steady relationship, I wandered onto the dating site and scrounged up a woman that was without a partner. Kind of like, I cut one out of the herd. That's cowboy talk. Because of the nature of the contact, I don't feel comfortable releasing her name or picture, but for reference sake, let's call her Katie <-----her real name! Katie is 49 (I checked) Blond and shapely. She has an attractive face and seemed attracted to me. Here is how I know. She wrote to me twice when I was on Match.com and because of one reason or another, I never responded. See, I'm faithful! So knowing that Katie was attracted to me, I sent her an email that read: "Where do I know you from? Paris, the French Riviera, Italy or was it Match.com? Katie responded immediately and we kind of took off from there. I gave her my phone number and she called me within seconds, when I said I remembered where I knew her from and it's....Ugh!

The phone rang, almost as I was sending my message to her. I saw from the caller ID, it was Katie and it offered her last name. I answered and we chatted for about 30 minutes when her guest arrived and I politely said I'd not occupy her time while she had company. We said goodbye and she said something to the effect that she enjoyed chatting. Great.

With nothing else pressing and she had offered that she owned an alternative healing clinic in Tempe. I decided to Google her and when I did, was I ever surprised? Here is what I found. There were numerous articles written about her for her clinic, but not near as many as were published about her career as a Court TV...... groupie? What would you call someone that spends all of their time following murder trials? Katie was instrumental in the conviction of the murder trial of Lacy Peterson's husband, Scott! I started reading and couldn't stop. It had a grip on me. Upon later researching this less than anonymous lady, I discovered that her sister, who was only 3 years older was murdered by a German that came to this country for the sole purpose of finding a wealthy woman and marrying her to collect her life insurance. He found Kathy's sister, romanced her with the aid of rented limos and rented tuxedos, bought a 2 million dollar life insurance policy on her the day after their wedding and killed her the following day! He violated her so tragically that she was almost decapitated when they found her tortured body.

Kathy was instrumental in this trial, as a witness and when he and his brother were both convicted and given the death penalty, Kathy evidently missed the drama of the trial and was immediately attracted to the Scott Peterson murder trial, that was just coming together. Kathy went to California on several occasions and posted her reports on message boards across the country. It said in the article that she had 38,000 readers. She was represented by Gloria Allred in a portion of that murder trial, who offered her services pro bono.

Interesting story so far, huh? Well, here lies the problem. When I told her I'd read the articles on the Internet, Kathy got pissed off, like I had invaded her privacy. Now my question to you, my readers. Is it an invasion of privacy if you read what's posted on the Internet? I certainly didn't think so. I've had women do background checks on me prior to meeting me for coffee. I feel it would be a shame if information was offered to me and I didn't take advantage of it, in a healthy way. I'd call that, "Shame on me". She asked how I figured out her identity and I answered, "caller ID"..... My God, it's 2010!

I think it was at that point that she seemed to get kind of creepy and told me she was uncomfortable with the way I learned about her and the way she made me feel was not too cool. So, it's back to the drawing board for me, or probably just cruise solo for awhile.