Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Then, In Walks Roberta!

It was a day like any other day, boring, long, restless and full of obligations, mostly to myself in getting well. The phone rang and it was Carol, my chimpanzee nurse. She announced her intent to come over and was it okay if she brought a new potential employee. Someone she was training. Certainly, no problem was my answer. That was my first mistake. Fifteen minutes later they were at the front door and when I made the mistake of letting them in, I was introduced to Roberta, who almost ran over poor Carol to get to me first to orchestrate her own introduction. She chased me into the room where my infusion usually takes place, talking over anyone that even thought of making a sound. I sat down in my reclining chair, where Roberta occupied my personal space, something I despise. 

With her ugly fat face about 2 inches from mine, she told me that she had heard about and read about my plight and that all she can say is that she has gone through almost the same type of loss herself. She recently lost her voice and could not sing lullabies to her new grand baby. Really, really??? Roberta told me that she used to be a hospice nurse for many years and suddenly I remembered why I recognized her and also hated her. She just kept on babbling and telling me how sorry she was about my life. I think it was right around that time that I maxed out on Roberta and told her point blank, "DO NOT PATRONIZE ME"!!! You'd think that she would have backed off, but no. She continued to apologize and if for any reason I thought she were patronizing me, I was wrong. She's just very caring... At this point, Carol got up off the floor where Roberta had pushed her to get to me first. Carol said something to the effect of lets move things along with my antibiotics. Roberta once again took charge and believe it or not, she was instructing Carol on how to do things.

It was then during an appreciated quiet moment that it occurred to me that I'd seen this abortion before and I asked her if she knew MJ Roberts (NMS) from Hospice of the Valley? Roberta got that, "I'm gonna tell a lie" look on her face and said, I don't remember coworkers names, just faces. A lot of people are that way.

Shortly after that, we were finished with my drug infusion and Roberta got up, and with that going away voice, said goodbye. She wished me luck in my effort and told me that she may never see me again. I looked her straight in the eye and said, "I'm counting on that!" 

The following day, about 45 minutes before Carol was due, I sent her a text message. It said, "Do not bring that woman here again. If she's with you, I will not let you in. If she is with you, drop her at a gas station or just sitting in the desert sun. Thank You, Mel" Carol did not know how to send a text, but was laughing when she arrived.

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