Monday, December 24, 2012

Ego Assault




I spent Sunday, Christmas Eve, Eve with the Lovely Jules watching the Bears embarrass the Cardinals and eating pizza, a rare treat for me. (The pizza that is). Macy ( the pup) was her usual goofy self and tried her best to entertain me while LJ went shopping for an hour or so... When she returned, she loaded me up with Christmas cookies and I set out to drive home. While walking to her parking lot, I received a text message that Passport to Hike had emailed me from Match.com. It not being anything urgent, I waited until returning home before I actually read the email. To my surprise, it was from a 40 year old lady asking me if I were unattached and if so, would I mind contacting her for a possible relationship. Forty is 26 years younger than me and the same age as my youngest son. Unfortunately, she was a short rather plump woman that I wouldn't consider even if she were attractive, due to her age. Frankly, I find a forty year old looking for a man 26 years her senior somewhat defective. For your reading pleasure, I'll attach her email and my reply here:


You:

I am sitting here w my mother trying to convince her that this whole online dating thing isn't so bad. We both were rolling w your profile: if you're still single and interested in meeting a really cute fun woman who isn't into NASCAR and won't make you flamenco in the bathroom, let me know!

RE: You

Thanks for the nice email, always nice to provide family fun! However you're the same age as my youngest son and his older brother is too old for you according to your preferred criteria. Based on that, I'll have to thank you and no thanks.

Dutch
Her reply to me sent me wheeling into reality and realizing how full of myself I can get if not monitored. I sent the next few hours reading and watching a little TV when suddenly I received notice of yet another email from Passport to Hike. It said:
RE:
It wasn't for me: I was talking about my mother! Who is not yet a member!
Did you ever blow up a balloon and let it go and watch it deflate and blow around backwards? That's how I felt!

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