Friday, August 29, 2008

She's Got the Voodoo...

I have a friend that thinks she's got a spell on her. She thinks it's a Voodoo spell, which is really the worst kind. After doing her homework and plenty of research, she located a Voodoo witchdoctor right here in Phoenix and asked me to go along, if only for moral support. Doing my homework, I looked up this alleged doctor on the Internet and frankly the Internet barely acknowledged his existence, but refused to call his practice a Voodoo practice, but preferred to call his practice a healing practice, but did mention the removal of spells. It showed a respectable location near downtown Phoenix for his office and when I clicked on research this doctor, it showed he was evicted from that location and didn't show a more recent address. My friend had gotten a call from his secretary/wife to confirm her appointment and was able to obtain the correct address. We started driving and realized that the location we were headed to was in a very questionable part of town and as we got closer we realized it was a private office in his dilapidated home. When we pulled up to 3619 S. Harris Dr., there were at least 5 dismantled cars in what used to be his front yard and a big sign on the front door saying the "doctor was in". Below the sign was a shelf that had several shrunken heads posted and I mean posted!

Optimistically my friend said, Good he's expecting us and went trudging forward. A little more apprehensive, I felt a case of the Willies coming on and stayed back a few feet. When Hermie, my friend got even close to the front door, it opened slowly creating a creaking sound. The whole thing was getting really eery and I was all for running back to our car before it became more front yard decoration. It was hard to see inside as our eyes had not yet adjusted to the dark surroundings. I saw what appeared to be a homeless man sitting on a torn truck seat and he was passed out.........or dead. From a beaded doorway a moving vehicle came slowly over the threshold and I realized it was a motorized wheelchair. From a computerized voice came the words, Hello, I'm Dr. Sosa-Roche, do you have your copay? Hermie was too scared to move or say anything and I watched her jeans darken right around the groin area. We turned and ran out screaming at the top of our lungs and literally flew to our car, hopping in and screeching the tires out of there. We were both scared shitless and all Hermie could say was, this is the last year I carry Cigna!

Mel
8/29/08

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