That Decorator's Touch...

I can diagnose the problem with a car that's running poorly. I can look at a car and tell you if it's been cared for. I can give you the approximate value of a car or truck within $300 wholesale. I can do most things that by the time I've reached 63, that I'm supposed to do. I learned how to use a computer pretty efficiently for a guy that was born in 1946. I took care of my own landscaping for the past 17 years in this house and no one ever complained that it looked like the house was abandoned, but I'll be damned if I have a clue on how to "stage" a house for sale.

When my new Realtor left last week, she put the fear of God into me by telling me she'd be back to do some staging and that her husband would be with her to move heavy furniture. My silent reaction to that was, "knock yourself out", but that pool is staying right where it is!

While doing some work this week or last, I recall Oprah telling someone that a sofa looks good at the end of a bed, giving you somewhere to sit while putting your shoes on. For some reason, I stopped what I was doing and made a mental note of the worthless blue sofa that sits in a loft area upstairs, that I've actually never ventured into. Lifting and pulling it into my bedroom seemed a good idea. When the carpet cleaners came yesterday, I lifted it up on top of my bed so he could clean under it. Now the carpeting is dry and when it was time to put it down, I tried it at the foot of the bed and for your viewing pleasure I captured it with my $10 cell phone camera.

Frankly, it was the first and last time I'll ever believe a 200 LB female talk show hostess, because as you can see, it didn't "pop" but was more likely to explode if I left it there. In addition, there was a pretty expensive rug that I had nailed to the wall in there, to keep the dogs from ruining it. I've been told by a reliable source, that actually has a gay decorator named Ethyn that it doesn't belong on my wall. That came down too, leaving pretty bad scarring on my freshly painted wall. This is my end result. When this is finished, I'm probably going to stick to the things I know, like complaining!