What a paYne in the ass it is when people decide to spell their names in an unusual way. Why can't Steven always be Steven instead of Stephen. It only screws us up, you know? It literally plays hell on alphabetical order. As if my life weren't complicated enough, last week I met two new ladies, and one was GaYle and the second was JaYne. Are they in cahoots? They're close in age, but are from different parts of the country, so I hardly think their mothers came up with this phenomenon together. No, it was clearly a plot to confuse me. In my brain, a confusing place to begin with, I have decided that since they came on board together and they both have the same unusual way of spelling their names, that I should confuse them. They both appear on my cell phone and when I think of them, I do so together, in spite of the fact that they don't know each other and never will. Although I've spoken with Gayle more, I met Jayne tonight and frankly, she was charming. She's smart, a pharmacist, and had the nerve to correct my pronunciation of a word I used tonight. I liked that. Mostly, she's down to Earth and doesn't take herself too seriously. As I pulled up to our meeting place, a lounge close to my house, she text messaged me, "So where are you already"? She drove twice as far as me and still beat me there. I texted her back, "I've still got 2 minutes of alone time"! I walked right in and she was smiling. She has a great figure and was wearing skin tight jeans. Not a bad start for me. We enjoyed each other's company for about 2 hours and we decided to go out again.
What am I gonna tell GaYle?