Tuesday, July 20, 2010

The WORD from Dorinda's Parish. I'm OUT!

Longest forehead in AZ.
Somehow, in some way, the powers that govern over us must have decided I would be a good member of a dating service called Chemistry.com. I never enrolled or paid them any money, but as a perk of being a card carrying member of Match.com, my Alma Mata, I was given a charter membership. I can't seem to shake them. The only memorable claim that I can make, from being a charter member is that I've NEVER EVER met anyone through this service, but did in fact waste endless hours emailing. I can't even verify that anyone really exists at the opposite end of the Internet and I may just be writing to a computer. The thought of that makes me realize how silly all of this computer dating really is.

Here is what happened on my latest computer fiasco. I get an email through chemistry.com that Dorinda is interested in me. She sends me some silly crap entitled Love it or Leave it. It's a series of 5 photos of various things and I'm supposed to click either "Love it or Leave it". The pictures were of things like Beer, politics, the Eiffel Tower, puppies, tattoos and things that may be considered controversial. I finish the test and then am shown Dorinda's answers, (Whippy Dippy Doo and WTF kind of a name is Dorinda anyway?) One of the next series of tests was a question that asked "What indulgence do you partake of, that you know you should really give up"? By now, you guys know me, so I replied, "Black Tar Heroine". (Even made me laugh) and I ship off my replies to Dorinda. At some point I begin to feel guilty, because after all, Dorinda doesn't know me and doesn't know I'm 1/2 crazy from playing on these dating services for so many years, so I email her and apologize for my sarcastic reply. the following is my email and her reply, followed by my last and final reply to her.

Mel wrote:
Sorry my answers got kind of silly, but suddenly I looked down and realized I was 64 years old, answering questions that are geared towards kids in their late teens or early twenties. I REALLY don't use Black Tar heroine, but heard about it on TV shows. If you'd like to communicate the way people our age should, let me know and we'll move on from there. Frankly, I never joined this website and don't even know why I'm treated like a member.

Respectfully,

Mel

Dorinda wrote:
You really threw me at the 'Black Tar Heroin'. Didn't know what it was and didn't want to know. My only thought that was anything with the word 'heroin' in it must be awful! This close to hitting the DELETE button.

I think you are attractive and you actually live in Scottsdale instead of the other side of the country. Normal relationships are difficult let alone long distance ones.

Mel, my only hesitancy is that we are not of the same faith and that is a big part of who I am. I'm quite involved in my Parish and looking for someone who will share that.

I believe in totally honesty.

All the Best,

Dorinda


Well, it's certainly good that this came up early before we really started liking one another, but don't just put it away without learning something from it. This seems to be an example of how religion has not only caused wars in this world and represents the many who have suffered and lost their lives, but it took a wedge and pushed it between you and I, two people who if it were not for religion might have been a perfect match.

Regards to your parish..

Mel

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