Saturday, January 12, 2008

Spiders for Dinner?

In an all out effort to become a food critic, Julie and I went out for dinner last night. Although I've complained about many foods in the past, doing it and writing it down may be beyond me. Once you mention the steak is overdone, you've pretty much said it all. Frankly, to complain and have someone pay you to write it down is beyond my comprehension. I've been giving it away for years!

I arrived at Julie's house about 7:15 and she looked radiant. She had been to what she calls the spa and had some treatments done, all of which were too complicated to mention, so we'll leave it at that. She'd bought a new black sweater that truly complimented her figure and after she explained that it was NOT a maternity top, I felt better. We were off to the new Tutti Santi's on 59th Ave.

When we entered, I opened the large antique door and about 3 people fell out! It was mobbed. We scurried our way to the hostess and she asked if we'd had reservations. I replied, no but we'd like you to act like we did. Evidently that went over her head as she handed us down to her subordinate, a very confused young girl that asked if we had reservations. No, seemed to be the answer of the day. I told Julie not to worry as Lao, the owner came walking up with his hand outstretched and a smile on his face, saying my name. We greeted, exchanged niceties and he abandoned us. I told Jules not to worry, they know me here. We sat on a nice comfortable love seat when Julie said, why don't we wait in the bar. Okay, I replied and we headed to the bar to stand around, as there was no seating in there either, humph!

As we headed back to our private love seat, Julie mentioned that we were the only ones that were waiting, that everyone else was being seated. The 15 minutes seems to fly by and the hostess pointed a finger at us and pointed to a table in their Art Room. Her confused assistant escorted us to be seated, said something indistinguishable and left. Ah, the Art Room, named that way because there was some art on the walls, nice...

I picked up the menu and realized I'd forgotten my glasses and simulated reading the menu by Braille. That got me an elbow to the ribs by the "Lovely Jules". Back to business! Julie was kind enough to read me the menu and truly, the reason that I was there was to sample their pizza, that I'd heard was sensational. Julie doesn't like pizza and ordered an appetizer of Calamari and squid in a marinara sauce. That sounded interesting until it came. The other choice was to have it sauteed'. Julie and I got into an argument over what saute' means. She insisted it meant in a sauce and insisted that it meant fried. I just looked it up and it means to "fry in a small amount of oil". I knew I was right, but our waitress settled the argument by saying that fried is frita, but that's in Italian, I meant French! I can't wait to tell her I was right, that'll piss her off!

I excused myself to the men's room and when I returned our appetizer was offered. It looked scary!!! Okay, it was calamari un-breaded and floating in the marinara sauce that was good. In addition to the calamari, was the squid that looked a great deal like tarantula spiders that met a horrible death, like by drowning. One had crawled up on top of a calamari to try to avoid the burning hot marinara sauce, but to no avail. When Julie mention that the calamari tasted like ear lobes, I looked for a place to spit mine out! Julie used her napkin wisely and we were about done with appetizers, no fault of the restaurant's, just poor choices. We should have had the s-a-u-t-e-d selection...

The pizza came and it was great, but Julie doesn't really like pizza and took 2 bites and left the rest. So as not to leave her sitting alone while I feasted, I opted to eat a couple of pieces and ask for the balance to be bagged up. Julie mention that both times we had been here, that the service was under par and I agreed. It will probably take them a while to get the bugs out of their system, and their marinara sauce! Julie grabbed the check explaining that it was her turn to buy. I've never let a woman pay my way before, I'm old school, but I kind of like the new woman's movement, particularly when they pay! As usual, Julie WAAAAY over tipped and we left.

With out pizza boxed up, we forgot it on the table and headed home, where Pawpaw was delighted to see us and actually ran in circles to prove it..


C.A. said...

Oh wow...I haven't had any good calamari in a very long time. I like it fried with the sauce on the side.

Please ask the "Lovely Jules" exactly what earlobes taste like. I've licked a good many in my life, but never actually chewed one off.

Hope your Saturday is going well, Mel. I really enjoyed your post.

Mel said...

Nice job, CA. You made the "Lovely Jules" LOL!!!